This is what happened.

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January 21, 2013 by Wayne.

That’s not how it happened at all.


She was sleeping. I checked my teeth in the mirror and gently disentangled my blazer from the mess of blankets and clothes on the floor and brushed off the lint. The leaves outside were swaying to a soft breeze and the light that burst through danced across her thighs and the sweat glistened and beckoned. I left quietly.

I walked into a universe of people and empty space, watched the stars for a bit and when I got bored of that, I walked back into you. You were all hugs and kisses and fucks and I didn’t mind. I was tired of pretending anyway.

Meanwhile, she drank from an emptying bottle of vodka and sketched portraits of animals as the light crept away behind the buildings. When she got bored of that, she went out for food and came back with him.

So that’s why I think it was that night, after we cut out the rotting flesh. I guess.

When I woke up, you’d already left for work with my blazer.

I scrambled some eggs and left for her house. We went down to that street with the busker who runs a beaten to shit Jaguar through some bizarre loudspeaker-generator right outside the used book store that only sells cozy mysteries and beat-to-fuck photography journals. I ate at the burrito place while she had her test done and then we had a couple of drinks at the bar that plays drone music and watched the people as they walked past and then we went to the park.

She said: Maybe we should think about moving to that apartment we looked at, off Grandin. It’s not that bad, you know. Nice neighborhood. The people seem nice enough. Pretty close to the mart too?

Yeah. Yeah, of course.

The wind was moving around a bit quicker now but we sat and watched the descending sun and only left when she wanted to grab a bite from the takeaway three blocks down from her place. We ate from the cardboard boxes and watched Malcolm Tucker swear his Scottish lungs out.

Is everything okay? Nothing wrong with the-? She shook her head. Don’t worry about the test. It’ll be fine.

She dug her nails into my back and I grabbed her hair at the scalp and choked her. When we were done, I pulled out and threw the mess into the wastebasket and we fell asleep.

I woke when you called. I said all the things I meant to say and apologized and begged for you to come back and I told you only the good little bits haha and left out the emptiness – in my head, then I picked up and told you I never wanted to see you again.

She was sleeping. The house was quiet and I was breathing heavily and I checked my teeth in the mirror and reached down for the mess of blankets and clothes on the floor and remembered you had my blazer. The leaves outside were darting around violently and the light that burst through danced across her thighs, the sweat glistening and beckoning. I bent down and kissed her on the forehead and she shifted a bit in her sleep.

I took the next train.

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